Day 15 #OctPoWriMo 2020 – Perspective

We were asked a lot of questions. The theme I picked is Hell, and that my perspective changed through the years. Deprogramming one’s childhood mind is hard. The form I picked is a Diamante. Writing to make the shape of a diamond. The way to visualize all three rules:

Noun
Adjective, Adjective
Verb, Verb, Verb
Noun, Noun, Noun, Noun
Verb, Verb, Verb
Adjective, Adjective
Noun

I wrote an antonym diamante.

HELL
Awful Torture
Condemned Everlasting Burning
Brimstone Damnation Doctrine Delusion
Questions Disagree Reject
Sobering Affirmative
LIFE

~RuthScribbles

Reposting: Forbidden Waters

Just realized comments turned off…. now on….

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Today I listened to a YouTube video and it reminded me of my poem (Thank you Susi.)

This is a poem I wrote about 6years ago. Repost from a blog posted back on 4/18/ 2018.

I now have the tag #ReligiousTraumaSyndrome or #RTS.

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Forbidden Waters

“When we are not sure, we are alive.”
—Graham Greene

Sitting in church gazing through the window
The sun beckons me to leave.
The preacher rages on.
I believed. I was trained. I was sure. I was dead.

The preacher’s sermons sound like a drum beating in my head:
Only whores dance, rock and roll is for drug addicts.
Thou shalt not have fun. The sun hid behind the clouds.
I was naive. I was trapped. I was scared. I was dead.

Out in the brazen sun, I tested the waters.
A small transistor, hidden under my pillow,
Melodies, lyrics of wanton acts spoke to me
I was listening. I was tempted. I was not sure. Was I dead?

I followed the path illumined by sunrays and jumped into the pool.
There was no life preserver, I struggled against the waves.
My head came above the surface. I heard cheers and jeers.
I was escaping. I was scared. I was rebellious. I was not dead.

I met a girl who danced and loved rock and roll.
She was neither a whore nor an addict.
She enjoyed the full sun. She was not trapped.
I believed. I was free. I struggled. I was alive.

by Ruth 1/28/2013
revised 4/22/2013

aka RuthScribbles

A Quick Note

It’s Friday morning here

Head is mushy (I’ve been up for 1.5 hours)

Should go to senior center with hubby, even though I’d rather stay in.

The trees are turning colors this year. It’s so beautiful!!

I started a class/seminar on living with Chronic pain. I hope to get tips to help.

I pulled my book out (Leaving the Fold). I purchased this book in 2012. The reblogs were from 2013. I only got half way through. I’m stuck evidently but the feeling is there again to get through this, and a friend gave me a resource that can help.

So I’ll go exercise a bit and work on reading the book or start over. I’ve evolved since I started it 7 years ago… so it’s time.

Thanks for reading!

~RuthScribbles